Blessings of an “awful teacher”

When a parent complains to Wendy Mogul, about his/her child’s “awful teacher,” she says she responds with this:

“Great! He’ll learn a whole new set of coping skills dealing with her, skills he’ll need on the job and in marriage.”

She then adds, “Your child’s teacher spends nearly as many hours during the week with your child as you do. While you are the export on your own Nora or Eli, she is the expert on seven-year-olds and knows more about them than you ever will. By giving her the benefit of the doubt and resisting playing either offense or defense, you’ll have a better chance of making her both your both your and your child’s ally.”

These quotes come from pages 58 and 59 of her book, Blessings of a Skinned Knee, which by the way happens to be one of my favorite parenting books). In my tattered copy, these pages are bookmarked because I often find myself turning to them every time I hear about an “awful teacher” my child could have in the future. These passages allay my panic and fears and remind me not to borrow worries from a future that may not be.

You’re Not the Boss of Me! (How to cope with annoying people this Thanksgiving and beyond)

With Thanksgiving and other winter holidays approaching and social gatherings increasing, many of us have begun to anticipate and worry about upcoming interactions with bossy family members and acquaintances. Instead of feeling the season’s gratitude and joy, we sometimes feel resentment at having to travel distances only to be hassled once we arrive at our destination. Or we feel burdened by having to host annoying people in our own homes.

Of course, our interactions with bossy people don’t only happen at this time of year; they occur year ‘round. And, mothers in particular seem to be easy targets for the bossy types who love to inform us how parenting “should” be done.

We all have the potential to be bossy and act so more often than we like to admit (I’m sure my husband, younger brother, and children would happily give you an earful about just how bossy I can be!)

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My two favorite commencement speeches are…

At the start of the school year, it’s a bit odd to think of the end of the year, but sometimes, it’s good to flip things around.

Here are my two favorite commencement speeches on the web:

The Fringe Benefits of Failure by JK Rowling:

http://www.ted.com/talks/jk_rowling_the_fringe_benefits_of_failure.html

How to live before you die by Steve Jobs:

http://www.ted.com/talks/steve_jobs_how_to_live_before_you_die.html

They are both worth watching…again and again

A Confession and Two Lessons

I have the privilege of working with mothers who are both talented and caring. My clients are already very good at pretty much everything they do. They have or have had successful careers, and they are wonderful parents. They tend to be smart, funny, engaging, and passionate.

You may ask, “Why, then, do these women need a coach?” It’s a good question.

They usually come to me because there is either something missing in their lives or something they want to do even better. For some, it’s a career switch; for others, it’s making sure that they nurture a passion outside work and parenting. Others have a specific project they want to do well, like write a book or get their child into the right school without going insane (which, it seems, is no longer just a NYC problem).

So here’s my confession: I learn more from my clients than they learn from me. My clients’ collective wisdom is like a bottomless treasure chest. I use it to help each individual client. I also apply what I learn to my own life. And I share that in this my newsletters and blog posts.

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Big bangs for small bucks

Mom Corps has asked me to be their 30-minute mentor next Friday, September 23 at noon EDT.  I will be sharing some research-based strategies on how to start or give children allowances.  Done right, parents can use allowances to establish healthy money habits.  But, perhaps more importantly, these strategies will also make life a bit easier.So, please be one of the first 100 to register to attend this webinar for free.  All you have to do is click here.

Great advice re: talking to kids about 9/11 (and it’s not from me)

Thanks to a good friend for pointing this out to me:

http://www.commonsensemedia.org/new/talking-your-child-about-911-what-do-you-need-know

Ready or not…be calm not smug

With the storm approaching, I can feel nervous activity in my neighborhood rising.

Yesterday morning, our local Radio Shack was already out of D-batteries, flashlights and small radios.  I have to admit I felt a bit smug when I was in there.  I had a pack of D batteries in the fridge.  I was only buying some extra AA and AAA batteries.  I realized that my recent switch to rechargeable batteries–no matter how well the new and improved ones can hold a charge–won’t do me any good if the electricity is out and I need more.

Of course, my smugness didn’t last very long.  After coming home with heavy bags from a very busy grocery shopping experience at Fairway, I realized I had only bought fresh items.  DUH!  I felt so stupid.  It didn’t matter that I had printed a list from FEMA.  I panicked and shopped aimlessly with thoughts of “I usually don’t plan meals this far in ahead!”  “What do I do?” in my head.

So, my DH (darling husband) is back there at 6:20 this morning buying non-perishable foods.  Not once did he make fun of me or complain, he woke up early and went there on his own.

Once again, I was reminded I’m not perfect, I shouldn’t try to be.  I’m just going to do the best I can and be thankful.  And if something bad happens, I hope I will try to be calm so that I can make good choices .

Be safe everyone.

Best back-to-school advice (and it’s not from me)

From business services to retailers, everyone was giving out “back-to-school” advice. I’ve reviewed a lot of them, and by far, here is my favorite and it’s not from me. It’s from Christine Carter and Rona Renner:

http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/raising_happiness/post/podcast_BTSGrowthMindset/

I’m a big fan of their Raising Happiness Podcasts, so check it out!

***Even though your child may already be back at school, the advice they give in this podcast is something to try out all year round.***

Watching the weather to see if we can knit for charity outside

We didn’t get to knit outside because the weather is too hot. Now rain threatens…. I will still hope.

In case you want to join us, click here.

From the (truck) driver’s seat

I’m sitting at the driver’s seat of a truck so that the guys moving some of my furniture don’t get a ticket.

I’ve never driven van or SUV before so I am sort of amazed at the view I get from here. Not only am I up higher, but the dashboard is lower and the side mirrors are also bigger. So, while the windows themselves may not be much larger than your average car, I do feel as though I can see so much more of my surroundings.

I can’t help but think it is sort of like the rare moments when I am able to lift myself up a bit from my day-to-day life. When I have a chance to look past the car ahead of me (i.e. the rush, worries, hassles, or chores that become part of the routine), I can see the road (i.e. my life) with better perspective.

I suppose the real question becomes: how can I play truck driver more often?